Are “Jirai Girls” Really That Different?

I’ve always felt a little uncomfortable with the term “jirai.”

Of course, hurting someone or trying to control another person in a relationship isn’t healthy. But at the same time, I think it’s only human for our emotions to become more intense when we’re in love.

That’s why I don’t believe that women labeled as “jirai” are somehow fundamentally different from everyone else.

In reality, I think many women—at least at some point in their lives—have experienced moments when love became the center of their world.

Feeling anxious because someone you love hasn’t replied.
Wondering if there’s someone else.
Wanting to feel more loved, more valued, more important to the person you care about.

Those feelings aren’t signs of weakness.

They’re simply part of caring deeply about another human being.

The real difference isn’t whether those emotions exist.

The difference is whether we become controlled by them—or whether we’re able to acknowledge them, understand them, and take responsibility for them ourselves.

To me, that’s what emotional maturity really looks like.

That’s why I don’t like putting people into boxes with labels like “jirai.”

Everyone experiences insecurity, jealousy, and loneliness.
What separates us isn’t the emotions themselves—it’s how we respond to them.

Love has a way of revealing who we truly are.

So rather than dividing women into “jirai girls” and “normal girls,” I think a far more meaningful question is this:

How does someone face their own emotions when they’re in love?

The answer to that question tells you far more about a person’s true character—and their genuine beauty—than any label ever could.

心晴れるまで

土屋梨沙